Day 2 of my Christmas Advent Calendar. Instead of opening your little cardboard calendar . Open this blog to reveal the message for the day;
On the 2nd day of Christmas my true love gave to me...
Two Turtle Doves
The Old and New Testaments, which together bear witness to God's self-revelation in history and the creation of a people to tell the Story of God to the world.
So say Christian believers. On the other hand, to the non religious, 2 Turtle Doves in 1990's speak are well strong E's. Doves were a really clean and hyper type of Ectasy. My true love giving me a couple of banging E's is always most welcome. It certainly helps with the festive spirit. It makes you at one with the world, feel love for all, dance like a bitch and feel like God himself. The only trouble is the come down includes raging paranoia, dry mouth and feelings of utter depression when you come back to reality. That's the problems with class A's. A massive Up but a bigger down. Still, if you pop a couple on the 2nd you'll be fine for the big day itself.
Of course I never take them anymore, but if I did slipping a couple of cheeky ones on the 2nd day of Christmas is a tasty idea. Having said which I don't want to be blasphemous so let's stick with 2 turtle doves being the old and new testament. Who am I to argue against God. Let's leave that to Richard Dawkins.
I sang that little carol (is 'Twelve Days Of Christmas a carol?) since I was a kid and never knew what it meant, so there yo go at least I've learnt something today. Everyones favourite is 'five gold rings' of course. The rest you mumble until banging that line out in song.
I'm Still yet to feel the festive spirit despite watching 'Miracle on 34th Street' this afternoon. That's the other thing I love about Christmas. The movies. Obviously it's a little different now with digital TV. There are so many channels, even ones dedicated to movies. When I was growing up there were really only 4 Channels. (3 until the 80's) Yes we had it hard as kids. Only 3 channels. We had to wait for something decent to come on. Not like the kids of today who are spoilt for choice. Even being able to record, pause or play in advance on HD. We had to grind it out back then, having to watch a load of shit before your favourite show came one like 'Tiswas', 'Swapshop' or 'Minder'.
Christmas TV was awesome back in the day. Why? Because that's all you had. It had to be. Morecambe & Wise, Only Fools, The Bond Movie. Whole families watched them and the audiences were huge. 25 million plus. They catered for all the family. And every popular show did a Christmas special. Even Jim'll Fix it would do a xmas special. Usually from a Morgue or a Childrens Home (wrong)
Now families have multiple tellies in the house and 100's of channels so viewing figures have dropped. It's a shame really as back then it gave a real sense of unison for everyone to sit infront of the box and mong out together. Not talking of course, chewing on Quality Street, sleeping. Now families tend to do that in different rooms. So instead of not communicating as we did in the 80's, in the same room. People now not communicate in different rooms. Times have changed yet we all remain the same.
Still, I digress. I love movies at Christmas. 'It's a Beautiful Life', 'Tom & Jerry', 'Bad Santa' - I love them all. The silly emotional ones that preach love and unison at Christmas, the weepy ones, the funny ones. And of course no Christmas would be complete without The Italian Job. Every year it's on and it's almost a ritual in itself to watch it. Not the recent remake of course. That's shit. The original. Michael Caine 'blowing the bloody doors off', Benny Hill grabbing women's arse and Noel Coward being, Noel Coward. A Total 1960's classic. The ultimate nostalgia.
That's got me right in the mood for a Christmas movie now. I'm off to go and watch one. I believe 'Jingle Balls' is on Fantasy TV XXX. But then again you never really expected me to finish off (no pun intended) my blog without some kind of filth reference did you? How predictable I am.
Merry Xmas
xx
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