Today is Ying to yesterdays Yang. Or is it the other way round?
Anyway no more doing f*** all. So i woke up with vim, vigour and focus &then................................i signed on. My days work complete by 10.10am. I could get into this. Back in time for the last half of Homes under the Hammer. Tough.
Nah not really, had a dull 'doing stuff' at home day, washing, cleaning, paying bills, admin, work for my company, 45 min run by Thames & a cross train session in the park (brutal sprints etc). It made me feel purposeful and i liked it. It is weird though working from home as you can get into a habit of complete isolation. Days slip by, you rarely change out of your dressing gown and those strange things called 'people' become rather distant.
Before i knew it, it was 5pm. Where the hell does the day go? I hadn't even watched crap tellie. Thank god for 'Challenge Plus' to keep up with repeats of Flog It! episode 4576. I missed that one.
My cousin sent me some rather lovely messages from her holiday in Benidorm. Now it is not a place that I've ever wanted to visit. Yes the programme is amusing, but I'd rather visit Lebanon than Benidorm. No disrespect of course.
But my mind has been changed by her messages. I simply must go. Why you may ask?
Well apparently it's the capital of mobility scooters in the world. There are more of them whizzing about than cars. It is full of ex pats flopped on mobility scooters and makes Llanelli look sparse. I have to go. Amazing.
Young people, old people, retired, infirmed, lazy, obese, limping. It is the holiday choice of the benefit cheat and long term disability living allowance brigade. I think the Department for Work and Pensions does a Loyalty card scheme. It's insane.
The Rise of the Mobility Scooter has gone European. These days Britain doesn't manufacture anything other than bullshit and naked Royals, The mobility scooter is the only thing the UK are exporting to the world. (although they are made in China)
5 to 10 years ago you rarely saw them. 10-20 years ago you never saw them. Now they are popping up everywhere. They are a booming market. Usually in low income places and usually of course with people who have been on the sick for ages. There are of course many genuine cases but how many times do you play the game 'spot the person on the mobility scooter who you think. They can walk OK'?
You immediately think. Benefit cheat and 'lazy'. Still if they can get away with it they will. I know I'm already plotting my one soon.
The designers have gone bananas. You can get basic, deluxe, GTI and souped up luxury ones. They have a GPS Tom Tom with pre set DHSS address so it drives itself to signing on day.
They've even bought out the tandem scooter now for the couples who plot the scam together. I shit you not. It's happening people;
Alison spotted these two window shopping in Benidorm this very evening. Soon it will become like stock car racing and go karting. It may even become an Olympic sport. I for one would support it.
So the rise of the mobility scooter continues at pace (well a 5mph pace) Soon they will take over the world. Kids will have their own making the obesity problem out of control. They will have to make double seated ones. It is a snapshop of GB. Of modern life. Itss the way things are going. It's very funny and makes me smile. Great Britain. The world has gone completely mad. How on earth did it cope all those years ago?
I'm off to book my flights for Benidorm.
xx
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