Anyone would think the Torch being passed through Llanelli by an OAP on a mobility scooter in a white shell suit would have meant Monday was a major comedown. How can you top that?
Well, on any ordinary day yes it would. But not today. Today saw Llanelli buzzing. The Olympic torch? Fuck that. Yesterdays news.
What on earth is it that can make the once in a lifetime event that happened yesterday about as important as if the blue or red team won Bargain hunt today (it was Red, they cleaned up with a Vase that went for £210. I thought it looked a right shit hole myself)
Anyway, this big news that made Llanelli buzz and all come out onto the street and rejoice is that the Pasty Tax has been scrapped. YYYYYYYYEEEESSSSSSSSSSS!!!!
OK the above image i got from the Internet. it is not a Llanelli Pasty. Why? Because it's got garnish. No-one in their right mind would ever put garnish in a Llanelli Pasty. The only thing that would usually go with it is another Pasty. Oh and a diet coke of course.
But George Osbourne under intense pressure has scrapped this deeply unpopular Tax. Pasties will not increase in price. People who eat them may increase but the price won't.
It literally bought people out on to the street dancing, well as much as their lardy frame could take them. Pasties will remain untouched in this town. Babies will remain to be bought up on them and most of the adult population of LLanelli will remain chomping.
Surely the Olympic Torch should have been replaced by a flaming Pasty. That would have really bought the crowds out. Teenage girls with their pushchairs were celebrating like Wales had won the world cup, people were excited, A Victory for the not so little people.
it brought a huge surge in Pasty sales as the town folk in defiance and celebration tucked in. Jenkins the Bakers was sold out within hours. Greggs had to buy another set of queueing poles. The Llanelli Star sent reporters down to town to report on the pasty frenzy. It was like a pastry orgy.
So much so, that long tailbacks formed back to Queen Victoria Road due to a build up of heavy mobility scooter traffic. Apparently they were caught behind this little fella
It's not really a case of who ate all the Pasties. But the staff serving them too. Pasty eaters of LLanelli unite TOWIL
xx
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