Day of Rest; No miles; Conditions - Knackered; Weekly Mileage 15
Today i am buggered. There's no point beating around the bush. I watch enough of that online (sorry Mum) but i am exhausted. Kaput. The head is willing but the body is grumbling, so my aim to run everyday is on hold for now. As they say rest is best sometimes.
This week has been the 1st full one back into work. It's always a hard week for everyone as the year pans out in front of you. The zing, bounce and optimism from the sun of Dubai has been worn down a little by the daily commute, grind of London and full days in the office. The attitude has slipped a little, and the training has had to be crammed in around life commitments. This is a little disappointing as i feel I've lost a little bit of my focus this week. Reality has kicked in.
The intention was to grind out an 8 mile run tonight, but i decided to rest instead. I have run for 5 days straight, but lack of kip and feeling run down has contributed to my fatigue more than the running. If I'm honest i haven't been eating particularly well and my head is slightly negative after a midweek dip. I don't suppose the midnight binge of sugary shit helped either. It's just that 3ft box of Jaffa Cakes looked so bloody good.
No matter, a few bits of kip, decent diet and a few long runs over the weekend, in daylight, will soon get the mojo back and focus up again. I must not lose sight of the 'experiment' for the marathon to help with the discipline in everyday life. I think that has slipped this week.
On the positive, i have started 2012 pretty well and kept up my promises to myself, Train hard, write blog, enrol on comedy writing course, write and perform comedy. I attended the course last night and although it's allot to take on with everything i intend to keep up to commitment.
I have a massive feeling of guilt tonight that i haven't run, but it is important to rest sometimes both physically and mentally and shake things up. A tired body and tired mind is not good, nothing like feeling fresh and positive and with the weekend coming now, i have a target of 32 miles over 3 days to get myself up to the weekly total of 50 miles i am targeting for the next 2 weeks.Then i shall get on the track for the horrid sprints and hills to boost speed and endurance.
Today is a boring blog entry as I'm tired and grumpy. My self critical and low self esteem head is saying, "This is where people stop reading, you're blog is now too long and boring and blah blah blah...." See told you it's Negative sometimes, so i am now telling it to fuck off and leave it all be. You decide what you want to do, i just write my silly thoughts, the rest is up to the big fella.
I also have the worst gas in the world so it's probably a blessing i didn't go out as i would have had to wear a special runners nappy ('rappy) to keep things tight. See, there i go with the shitting again. Enough.It's disgusting, it's not big, it;s not clever and it's not hygienic. Tomorrow i will quote all kinds of philosophers and writers to cleanse myself of such base gutter talk.
Off to bed after evening of trying to write 5 jokes and other comedy stuff. Looks like i may have to employ the same techniques of focus, planning and determination i am trying to do for the running into writing too. Why can't i just be a genius and get things easily? God i am king baby tonight, best just bugger off to bed.
Nn xx
Nicholas Edward
Mate take it easy....caramel....don't feel guilty.....don't feel bad....you need your rest....F..k that, sounds like your head is winning.
ReplyDeleteKeep the focus, don't beat yourself up. True rest is good, but don't forget what you said in an earlier blog, 'F..k off mind'.
Enjoying your blogg so much love Mx