Day 134 - Eulogy to Nan - Passed away on this day in 2012

It is two years ago to the day when on the longest day of mid summer, my beautiful Nan passed away aged 97. Here was the eulogy I wrote for her funeral.


EULOGY TO NAN
I have been asked to say some words about Nan. Or to others here Mum, Lil, Lillian, Auntie Lil, Nan Lil or Mrs Probert.

She lived such a long life, and was so well loved by so many. Her Daughter Jan and Son Ken, Her 3 Grandsons& 1 Grandaughter, Her 2 Great grandsons and 2 Great grand daughters, her sister, her nephews, her nieces and so many friends from the town and community who loved and respected her. We are all here today to pay our respects

We are here to share memories of Nan. To honour her, her life, her spirit. To remember what made her so special to us. They are not just my memories but all of ours. I speak for everyone who loved her.

Margaret Lillian Daniels was Born 13th April 1915. On the Bryn. The 5^th of 10 children. Her father, or Daki, David Daniels was a chauffeur and her mother, or Mamgi, Mary Jane Daniels a maid. She spoke so fondly of her childhood and how it shaped her attitude to life. She would remember how her mother would cook fresh bread, cakes and suppers, clean, keep the house and bring up the children. Big boiling pots, cakes left out to cool. Her father reading the paper. Learning respect, family love and honour. It shaped her life. She was a happy from a young age.

She was a tough character. Angelic but strong.

She packed off to work at 14!!!!, (told you she was strong) becoming a housemaid for a Bank Manager in Park Howard, She cried herself to sleep every night but worked there for 6 years. She was a grafter.

She then met Edwin Vernon Probert. She was Not keen at 1^st. One night he walked her home and bought every Chocolate Bar in the sweet shop to win her heart. She always had a sweet tooth.

Later He chose a weekend riding a Norton motorbike over meeting her. She wrote him a letter saying it’s me or the motorbike. They were married for 51 years! He chose well.

They were married in this church 26^th March 1940, Easter Saturday. Their wedding present a joint of welsh lamb! They moved into Brynmoor Road and so started a beautiful 51 year marriage and a 72 year stay at Brynmoor Road. She was the oldest member of Dafen church, the longest serving resident of Brymoor Road. She was quite simply the best.

She lived in Brynmoor Road for 72 years and in that time has cooked 296,567 Sunday Roast dinners, 600,966 Rock Cakes and said 'Therewarthen' 3.4million times. She is a star. Everyone loved her.

You couldn’t leave the house without a straining stomach or 7 litres of tea inside you. I never met anyone who loved ‘a nice cup of tea’ as much as her. I think she was responsible for 50% of PG tips sales in Wales.

She was an avid watcher of the news & weather. Lunchtime, early evening and News at ten. Forget BBC news Just ask Nan. I will miss my weather reports

She Loved to talk. Sometimes barely drawing breath. But she did get the occasional thing wrong. For instance she felt sorry for those long distance HIV drivers. Would occasionally like a cubicle of chocolate and liked Michael Portaloo on BBC.

Her house was immaculate as was she. Neighbours remembered her for having the shiniest door knocker in Brynmoor Rd. She was always cleaning the front. Standards you see.  Even the parlour (or front room) looked like a showroom, though it was rarely used. I think she was saving it for Terry Griffiths, the home town boy. Or as Nan used to call him ‘Terry’. She had a soft spot

She used to lower her voice when she talked about neighbours,  like they were listening. Her memory was incredible and she could bamboozle with her complex knowledge of what was happening in Llanelli.

She always stuffed money in my hand when i visited, she was a total giver and carer. Hard working, humble and loving, but would never say it. She liked to send cards with footballs or trains on the front even when i was into my 30's,

She would hum and sing when she was going up the stairs in key. She was always so happy.

She answered the phone in a posh phone voice ‘Heelllooo’ – oh it’s you Rob

She loved boiled mints and always had a bigger supply than Rowntrees.

Coining the immortal phrase "Do you want a mint in your mouth?" - AS opposed to where Nan?

Her cooking was legendary. Victoria Sandwich sponge, Christmas cake, Bread and Butter Pudding, Ham and Parsley Sauce, Rice Pudding, Welsh Cakes and homemade Chips. Bread and Butter was placed on the table at every meal time. Butter melted in front of the fire. Old school.

Like most Welsh women She was a feeder. A way of expressing love. 

"Want a sandwich?"
"No thanks Nan, I'm OK"
"Rock Cake?"
"No Nan, I'm stuffed after the Roast Dinner at 11am"
"Have a Breakaway"
"No thanks"
"Blue Ribband?"
"No"
"Have a Kit Kat"
"No Nan, I'm full"
"Biscuit?"
"No"
"Rich Tea, that doesn't count?"
"No thanks Nan"
"Digestive?"
"No"
"Fig roll?"
"No"
"Garibaldi?"
"No Nan, I'm stuffed"
"OK then, if you're sure"..............
,.......................................
"Crisps then" and so on



I can still see her false teeth in the old Stork Margarine tub by the sink,

I can see her in The kitchen rubbing Nivea cream at bed time. I can picture her old shopping trolley in the conservatory, I can see her in her housecoat, going to the shops on a Friday and getting her hair ‘set’.

I can see her sitting in her chair watching Emmerdale

I can see her Drinking a cup of tea and eating a kit Kat

I can see her immaculately turned out in what she like to call a new ‘rig out’

I can see her Popping into a room you were in and saying 'therewarthen', like a Welsh gap filler. It was a word that meant absolutely nothing but said so much.

In short she was adorable. The last week has seen a steady flow of visitors, paying respects and wishes. The Kate and William commemorative plate had to be moved from the mantelpiece to accommodate the cards. She is well loved.

I suppose that's what happens when you have been so respectful and lovely to people throughout your life. It is given back.

She was so active, It must have been be hard to lose her fierce independence. She was a proud woman. And despite everything she Never complained. Never showed pain. ‘No one likes a moaner’ she used to tell me. She was always so ‘up’. Everyone who cared for her said how much of a model patient she was.

We know there are many special carers here today who made her life more comfortable. You know who you are but Nan and we are so grateful to you.

Something that sums up her spirit – About 5 years ago she fell over and broke her leg. Ken arrived to pick her up and put her in her chair. He said he will call an ambulance and the doctor. She said ‘No fuss, just wanted to go to bed and have a cup of tea’. She was so tough.

It was nice to listen and spend time with her, respect. Learn from. She comes from an era where life was simple. Family was key. You didn't moan, complain and were grateful for your lot. She was a Grafter and humble, No ego. No resentment. She didn't talk about emotions but showed love.

So Nan. We salute you. We salute your attitude, your spirit, your gratitude. We salute you’re life. When you were asked about the secret to your long life, you pointed to you’re legs and said ‘these are my transport’ .

Your legacy is a message of hope, of positivity, of activity, to get on with life, to be grateful for your lot, to be happy. We celebrate your life.

It’s hard to think she is no longer here, because she has always been here. Death is sad. Loss is hard. But she is not lost. She will never go. Because she lives on in our hearts & our souls.

We love you Nan. May you rest in peace

xx


Together We Are Stronger


Nicholas E Evans