I so love getting up for work after comedy. Usually i've sunk so much diet coke i could stay up for days, so i rarely drop off before 4am. Then i'm up at 7am for work. Rather fatigued.
Still it doesn't matter, its pissing with rain and i had a 7.30am email from someone at work. It read;
Dear Nick
Can you order another box of letterheaded paper please. We are running low
Regards
L
Fuck me, i can hardly wait. I literlly ran into the office to get it sorted. It's my favourite email ever. i will save that. Thank god i did all that education. Last night i was discussing a possibility of £100k investment for my business and today i am ordering letterheads. Nice.
I suitably coasted through the day, managing not to do too much whilst trying to stave off the desire to eat the entire world's supply of Ben & Jerry's. Tiredness leads to sugar craving, which leads to 50 ton man eating. Nasty.
At the back of my head was a dread of this weekend. I've been invited as a guest of a new clients to the British GP at Silverstone. Whats wrong with that you may say? Well. it;s all weekend. Saturday, Saturday night sponsors dinner and then all day Sunday. It's pissing down, it's muddier than a Barclays bonus, i'm not a fan of F1 and it's 40 hours spent with guys who will be drinking heavily. To say i've got a bad attitude about it is an understatment. Never seen the attraction of cars or motor sport - i'm more of a watersports man myself.
If i'm honest it;s been so full on, all i really want to do this weekend is chill. Instead i'll be spending time in wellington boots, in mud, being pissed on in the company of men drinking, watching cars drive around and around. It's so lucky i'm not an ungrateful person otherwise i'd be doomed.#attitudedjudstment. If i remember No one likes a moaner Nick. Get a fucking grip. (i added the last bit Nan)
I bunked off at 4pm to go home and watch Murray play. I had great intentions on watching it at the gym whilst working out, but decided the best workout i could do, was on a sofa stuffing M&S melted chocolate puddings down my gob whilst watching Murray attempt to fist pump and scowl his way into the Wimbledon final.
It was the first full match i watched and what a beauty. It reminded me of old school Wimbledon matches i watched as a kid. Why? Because Tsonga played serve and volley. Exciting tennis. Proper male machismo testosterone tennis like 70's and 80's. Bash the fuck out of the ball, launch yourself at the net and dominate play. Not like the wimpy fucks now who do endless basleine rallies. The only baseline i want to watch for hours on end is in a Ragga club. They all used to be serve and volliers back in the day. McEnroe, Connors, Lendl, Becker. Apart from Borg, but he was just cool as fuck. Nowdays it seems to be endless rallies and who can grunt the loudest.
This though, was high quality enthralling tennis and fair play to the miserable Scot for holding out. he played like a fucking god for 2 sets, Vanessa Feltz for 1 and hung in there for the other. He won, is in the final and whilst i have a genuine hatred for Daily Mailism of Wimbledon, i got right into it and it reminded me of watching as a kid. Gripping stuff.
I then went to my first meeting of the week, of course wanted to machine gun everyone in there, then i had a bizzare conversation after, a weirdo who i barely know came up to me and said;
"how was the funeral"
"well, how do you think"
"And did you certify your family member"
"Not really someting i want to talk about"
"Well on better news a friend of mine's son has signed for Northampton Saints"
"What the hell has that got to do with anything"
"Well i thought you like Rugby"
"I do, but coming on the end of those 2 questions without discussion i actually couldn't give a fuck if someone i don't know, never met has signed for a Rugby Club - In fact fuck off"
Granted i was a bit harsh, but what the fuck, you don't just march up to someone, fire off 2 really personal upsetting questions, don't even have the grace to even look or sound remotely interested and then throw in that comment. It was a bit Ricky Gervais for my liking. Sodding knobheads are everywhere.
Went home, ate omlette, watched movie until too late, 4 hours kip and then the day from hell tomorrow. Sorry Nan, opportunity to get into a new sport and embrace the mud.
have a good weekend campers, lets see if i do
xx
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