Although denied by Jenkins before anyone actually knew about it. She has publicly come out and said "i categorically deny this" - so everyone has gone, "fuck me i didn't know that. Guilty". Kind of backfired.
Cue pics of Posh looking glum, Jenkins and Becks Papped, endless debate, denials 'spokesman for....'. Oh god it's so fucking tedious.
So one of the most famous married men on the planet has allegedly 'had it off' with a less famous woman who happens to be Welsh Opera singer. Just happens everyday doesn't it?
I mean infidelity and affairs have been happening since the beginning of time. If it happens against you it is hurtful and devastating. If it happens to famous people. We're all over it. Loving it.
But Posh v Jenkins? Well you can't blame Beckham can you? I mean if you go on singing ability alone Jenkins pisses all over Posh. Then when it comes to smiling, well again Jenkins scores highly. Welshness and humanity is also in favour of the Jenkins as we rarely hear or see Posh smiling, talking, laughing. In fact it is debatable if she is actually real and human.
But lets not blow this out of all proportion, for the girls you will feel sorry for Posh. her husband has cheated on her and that's not groovy. But lets have this straight - if you build you're life into public property, create yourself as a brand, use that to launch all kind of products and use the fame game. Creating publicists and a machine of commercial and consumerism then fuck it, I've got zero sympathy.
I suspect alot of women Will not feel sorry for her either. Her identity is difficult to feel any kind of warmth or respect for. Is she a good female role model? A mother, a successful pop star,designer, wife. Rarely controversial or bad behaviour ed. Surely she must be a good role model. Well i guess if you like you're role models to be totally bland banal and 'cosmetic' then yes i suppose she is.
Having said all that, she is human, she must hurt, though i'm sure her publicist, manager, nutritionist, trainer, counsellor, PR, PA, cook, nanny, stylist, hairdresser, suregeon, beautician and celebrity friends will rally round her.
And what about him? He can fuck off too. Create a family man image and play on that, whilst in the background fucking his way around the world means he can have it too. I'm not going to morally judge him on cheating, Christ I've been there myself so cannot judge, but then again I've never promoted myself as a family man, a statesman. Or had a massively gay moustache or talk like an Essex girl.
His brand and PR people have created the Beckham brand of family man etc. That's fine but the old cliche of doing it behind closed doors comes out and he becomes no different from a politician. Still, he is so untouchable he could rape the Queen live on BBC and still the public would say 'gosh isn't he good looking' (did i really say that? Christ George Galloway must be salivating)
Fill yer boots son but don't promote the family image whilst you're at it
Having said which, I've been called Beckham 4 times in the past 10 days. Weirdly by a load of builders the other day. Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't builders supposed to wolf whistle at fit women and hurl sexual innuendo at them. Clearly men have become far to metro sexual these days when builders shout 'oi you look like beckham' at blokes. Next thing they'll be shouting 'oi did you moisturize'. Wrong
I get the Beckham thing alot. It's quite bizarre because i look nothing like him. Yes I've got a wedge haircut and blond barnet but that's about where the resemblance ends, though i continually get it when I'm out and about. But please, readers trust me if i ever end up looking like this.........shoot me.
Shit, that's it, that's where I've been going wrong. Fuck the stationary and marketing, maybe i could be his body double and stand in? If i got a big pair of gay pants and needless tattos, I mean he's got to keep up the pretence that he loves Posh and be a family man right? Someone's got to keep the Jenkins warm in his absence. Perfect. I mean we're both Welsh right?
I could keep her fascinated for hours with my tales of llanelli and how mobility scooters are on the rise. I could even prepare her my speciality. Tin of tuna with salad cream. Yeah, fuck it. Move over Beckham, the Evans is taking over now. I've just got to sign on first and I'll be right there #jobseekersallowancebeckham
xx
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